the wednesday wonder

this is so effing frightening

You are never, ever going to believe this...I've got a column up at AMC! Weird, right? Anyway, I talk a bit about Mr Mack Daddy himself, Lon Chaney. Go, read, comment! Or don't. Be a jerk if you want- see if I care.

One last time for the whorin': Alone in the Dark 5 (PS2, PS3, Xbox 360, Wii, PC) dropped yesterday. Anybody pick it up? I haven't gotten my review copy yet (which is my prize for whoring out and talking about it, in case you didn't know), but I'll be sure to...uh...review it when I do. It looks like it'll be fun, even if I have no clue what it's really about. This screen shot doesn't help much, as it seems that the main character's "journal" or what have you is culled from a deluxe pack of magnetic poetry.

click to embiggen

Eh, no matter. As I said, it looks like fun and I'm psyched to play it. Then again, I think that pretty much all video games look like fun and I get excited to play things like Zoo Vet where I get to diagnose computer animals' computer illnesses and give them computer medicine. "The penguin has a sore foot? I'll be there right away!" This either makes me a person filled with child-like excitement and wonder regarding the world around her, or a person filled with child-like idiotic tendencies. Either way, I'm obviously more than a little Nell.

"Don' wor' chick'bay...tay na winn"

I just thought you all might like to know that Jessica Harper left a comment on my Suspiria review and posted her website address- and she welcomes emails! How awesome is that? HOW AWESOME I SAY.

Yes, there's always the chance it's not really her, but come on. I'm going all Occam's Razor on this one.

Jessica Harper!

Commented!

On a Film Club review!

Speaking of the Final Girl Film Club, it's time to pick a film for next month. What a great response for June's movie, Lifeforce! You guys rock my face off. I haven't made my way through reading all the reviews yet, but I'm working on it. Reading may be fundamental, but it's also so very hard. As is math. Damn my girl parts!

The point is, yes, July's pick is...



The Car, bitches! James Brolin! Ronny Cox! THE CAR! It's totally like the Jaws of...of cars, man.

I love that trailer. I love the woman on the phone- "I think I hear the engine of that car..." and if after watching it you're able to get the "honk...honkhonkhonnnnk" out of your head, you're made of stronger stuff than I.

The Car is available on Netflix for you Netflix peeps. Sa-weet! I can't wait.

The movie: The Car
The due date: Monday, August 4

In other news, has anyone ever made a movie about a flying shark? If not, someone totally should. Ooh! And the shark should go "honk...honkhonkhonnnnk" when it's not screeching like an eagle. And the mayor should totally refuse to cancel the annual beach festival despite all the warnings about the dangerous shark- then, after a dead body washes up on shore, he should totally cancel the festival...but it won't matter because the shark can fly and therefore NO ONE IS SAFE! It can get you anywhere!

"I think I hear the honking of that shark..."

It totally writes itself.